Visits

Alan, Lucy, and I were fortunate enough to have a few visits already this summer. First my sister Alex came for a short week. Now let's be clear: her primary motive for flying to Kentucky was Lucy, but we all enjoyed her company just the same. We took walks-- several, in fact, as Alan kept taking the car downtown and we kept inventing reasons to drive around. Alex baked, of course, and we made her watch Flight of the Conchords. One rainy day we bought craft kits from Hobby Lobby and made sun catchers and coasters.

Then this past week we had the pleasure of welcoming my Mom. Aside from dragging her out for a jog, insisting she stay up late to see Jupiter's moons through my binoculars, asking her to make shrimp tikka masala, having her hold Lucy while I picked raspberries, and whining at her to help me clean out my pantry, I didn't make her do too much. We all had some good, solid theological discussions about annhilinationsism and matters of the human soul. And then we had her listen to some Roy Wood Jr. prank calls and she laughed and laughed.

Lucy had a great time with Alex and my Mom. She thinks they are both soooo hilarious. She kept cracking up and looking at me and Alan as if to say "Where did you find these people!?"

Thanks for coming guys. Hope to see you again soon.

...And One More Thing.

We had a nice 4th of July. After watching the end of the Wilmore parade, the 3 of us headed down to the camp meeting for 25 cent hot dogs and cheap Ale 8 accompanied by Ryan and daughter Morgan. It drizzled on and off. After hanging out with our friends for a bit we watched Punch Drunk Love (my first time, I thought it was very funny).

We ordered BBQ chicken from Sonny's for dinner and our whole crew ate together, played some croquet and Apples to Apples, roasted marshmallows, passed the babies around, and had some laughs. After dark we watched the fire works from a distance and lit sparklers (thanks Mom and Dad). Tomorrow a bunch of us ladies are venturing out for the town wide yard sale. Yeah!

I can't help but think of our first 4th of July in Wilmore, being very tense and unsure of ourselves-- I'm very thankful for settling in to this lovely little place and for all the friends and acquaintances we've made here.

A bit about freedom, in honor of the 4th

'Marriage, in what is evidently its most popular version, is now on the one hand an intimate "relationship" involving (ideally) two successful careerists in the same bed, and on the other hand a sort of private political system in which rights and interests must be constantly asserted and defended. Marriage, in other words, has now taken on the form of divorce: a prolonged and impassioned negotiation as to how things shall be divided.' - Wendell Berry, Feminism, the Body, and the Machine

Before moving to Kentucky Alan gave me a book of short stories by a man named Wendell Berry who, I'm ashamed to admit, I'd never heard of at that point. Alan mentioned he happened to be a writer and farmer who was also a Kentucky man, and this book might give me a taste of Bluegrass living. Since moving to Jessamine County what's captivated me about Wendell Berry has more to do with his insights into conservation, social relationships, and the pitfalls of American living than his fiction about the Commonwealth.

The quote above is taken from a short essay Berry wrote in response to some of his critics. After mentioning in an article for Harper's that his wife types his manuscripts on a typewriter, Berry received several letters denouncing him as an oppressive husband, treating his wife like a "household drudge."

So Berry poses this question: if he'd mentioned in the same article that his wife was a career typist, would he have heard the same outcry? Probably not. There is something about a person who works outside the home that says "freedom" or "independence" whereas the one who stays home with children or farms or runs a cottage industry calls to mind some kind of bondage.

Are we really so dense any more? I haven't talked to so many people in my life, but most of those I've come across have suffered a fair amount of oppression in the work place. Berry's point seems to be that the best thing at the beginning of the industrial age would have been for women to call there husbands back home to labor rather than for men to drag their wives into the machine we call work.

I don't have any problem with working outside the home; I do know that for me it was a constant fight to keep my dignity intact and my spirits up. And I know we need lots of professional people, but why is that the ideal for all? You can't tell me there is more freedom for the person who sits behind a desk all day than my friend who spends her time tending a garden and working at the children's library. Nor can you say that a single mom I knew in New York who made a living dying yarn and raising her 5 kids is oppressed because she removed herself from a high power corporate job.

People of both genders would do well to rethink what it means to be free, to be independent, to be happy. After writing the statement I quoted above, Berry goes on to talk of how the American home is based on consumption rather than production. Whereas families once made things together, they now primarily consume beside each other. So I suppose if our purpose is to consume, than we all would do well to get good-paying jobs to support our purpose.

I know I didn't do Berry's essay much justice here, so please read it for yourself if you have the time. Thanks for reading this, I'll accept your criticisms as graciously as I can.

Race #1

I just finished my first 5K. My time was 41:49-- not great, by any means, but still an accomplishment for me. Thank you to Alan and Meredith for their pre/post race encouragement, to Amberly for cheering me on, and to RJ Corman who hosted the event. I talked with RJ for a bit while we were running and he turns out to be a very polite man, so it will be hard to still think of him as Wilmore's version of Mr. Burns (for those who don't know he is the millionaire up on the hill here).

The details? I ran, I walked, I watched quite a few people pass me and passed a couple myself. The hills were demoralizing, the onlookers were uplifting (except for the little girl who pointed at me and said "She's NOT going to win the race"!), and I appreciated the free spring water. Congrats to Meredith for placing-- we knew you'd do well.

Now I can see better the holes in my weekly routine. I'd like to keep running my whole life. My grandfather is a rather fit person for his age. He walks every day and has incredible endurance, which I learned all too well when he outdid Alan and I on a 5 mile hike in the snow (another blog post for another day). God willing, I will live to see 80 and still be out there jogging.

What I Did On My Summer Vacation (Part I)

Other seminary families know: true vacations are few and far between. Plane tickets and suitcases say "sleeping in my in-laws living room" or "a week fighting with my siblings" more than "some time off to relax." This trip was a little of both, a visit with family that had an excursion to the beach tucked in the middle.

We left Wilmore at 2am (only a few hours after Chad and Justin were under our car fixing it). As usual we thought we missed our turn in Louisville and got a little lost, barely making it to the gate in time. After being tossed over to Charlotte, NC (where they have rocking chairs all over the airport) we buckled in for a 6 hour flight to Tacoma. A pleasant surprise was waiting: our rental was upgraded to a luxury car. Alan had a great time using it to cruise through the city, avoiding the freeway at all costs.

After a few days of hanging out with Alan's family-- including our cute niece and nephews who are also so much fun-- we started preparing to caravan out to the Oregon coast. My two clever sister-in-laws had the whole thing planned out and we spent the day before shopping for our food.

We ended up driving the scenic route to Oregon which took hours, but we had a good time getting there just the same. I could not believe all the mountains, the inlets, the crusty little fishing towns we passed. It was cloudy (of course) but very beautiful, especially when we rounded one corner and there was the Pacific far below with waves crashing up on the rocks. I told Alan it looked like a scene in a Hitchcock movie.

Finally after 5 hours, a bout of car sickness, a stop to shop, and thousands of huge pine trees we were at the beach house, the roar of the ocean clearly heard on the other side of the dunes. I opened the car door, smelled the salt air and pine pitch, and felt like I could breath again.

"On our way, on our way home... the time we had is not gone." - The Mother Hips

"Tell me, where did you sleep last night?
In the pines, in the pines where the sun doesn't shine." - Lead Belly

What I Did On My Summer Vacation (Part II)

The house was simply lovely. It looked more like a beach cottage someone owns and frequents rather than rents out. The decor was beachy and homey with a beautiful hand-stitched quilt on the wall, fine furnishings, and a full kitchen. After a moment of unpacking and kid-proofing the house, Alan and I walked out to the beach, leaving Lucy to play with her cousins. The water was a mere thirty second walk from the back door (props to Desiree and Tamiko for getting a house right on the sand).

The sand was soft, there was drift wood as far as the eye could see. I didn't realize how pretty drift wood could be, all polished by the waves and bleached by the sun. The water was freezing but I didn't care. I'd never been in a place where the ocean is before you and at your back are mountains so high their peaks are hidden in the mist.


That night we ate tacos. (Note: I married into an eating family. Alan's family know what good food is and eat plenty of it. This, for me, is a key part of any vacation and I thank them all for putting a few pounds on me while out West). We spent a good hour or two in the hot tub that faced the water, watched Flight of the Concords, snacked on wasabi peas and fruit, and fell asleep that night lulled by the sound of the waves.

The next day was more of the same-- eating, walking on the beach, soaking in the hot tub, playing with the kids. That morning both my brothers-in-law, Bubba and Bryan, went jogging with me-- well, it turned out I was tagging along with them the whole time. The guys played pool and cooked a barbecue feast for us that evening. My father-in-law, Howie, roasted marshmallows over the grill for s'mores which was a much welcomed dessert.

Our final day we packed up and cleaned the house. We headed up to Canon Beach to see the sand castle festival and Haystack Rock. It was cold! But we still shopped and perused the castle competition. We warmed up with some clam chowder and seafood at Moe's before hitting the road. We wanted to be home at a reasonable hour so we drove home the quick way which involved a hair raising amount of hairpin turns (I was driving, Howie and Alan gripping the sides of the car with every cliff we passed).

As I said in the beginning, it was pleasant. I can't complain about a trip that afforded us new family memories, a chance to see the ocean, salt water taffy, plenty of pictures, and some time to relax.

"I'm still living with your ghost
Lonely and dreaming of the West Coast
We could live beside the ocean
Leave the fire behind." - Everclear

"We spotted the ocean at the head of the trail
Where are we going, so far away
And somebody told me that this is the place
Where everything's better, everything's safe
Walk on the ocean
Step on the stones
Flesh becomes water
Wood becomes bone

Now were back at the homestead
Where the air makes you choke
We don't even have pictures
Just memories to hold" - Toad the Wet Sprocket

Misc.

Like everything else, I cannot post one of those rad little mix tapes on my blog. Is it the blog? The stupid computer? I have no idea.

Anyway I am rocking out to Stone Temple Pilots and Wilson Phillips and Mr Bigg right now. Good fun. Alan and I celebrated our 2nd anniversary yesterday. Just youngins, I know.

Lucy started dancing the other day, bobbing her head and singing when she hears music! She's dancing right now! And clapping! (I'm a very proud parent).

I'm looking forward to a trip to WA. This time, FINALLY, Alan is taking me to see the Pacific Ocean. It will be nice to have a break-- no matter how much I love Wilmore it will be good to see family, visit a real city, and (thank you merciful God) breath ocean air into my lungs.

And my sister's coming for a visit after our trip. She wants to hang around town drinking Ale 8, harassing the local (sounds good to me!).

I'll write more later when I have something worth saying.